I scream, you scream…I scream some more.

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Classics. They exist for a reason. Yet why does it seem that with each passing year, any talk of adaptations (concerning anything) brings about a major concern of my children growing up in a world where their classics are simply regurgitated crap done right the first time around. But if that really were the case, why feel the need to tamper with at all, you may find yourself asking. Well, because we live in a world where people don’t know any better of course. Or are devout of any actual originality because of the time it would take to put forth something completely new and unseen.
Which had always been one of the interesting aspects about the Scream films. Their awareness of the world today, or back then rather and the intellect that transpired through all four films; despite the latest not receiving as much acclaim. But how would one successfully translate that into a weekly series sharing its same name and bearing its same ‘rules.’

With nothing but high hopes of drawing in a satisfied audience, Scream: The Series premiered on June 30th of this year. In a new town (Lakewood) with a back story pertaining to a similar guideline, (though with a hint of Friday the 13th) we soon learn the tale behind Brandon James. A boy born with an unfortunate deformity, picked on with the exception of Daisy aka Maggie (Tracy Middendorf), who we later discover is actually the mother of Emma. Ergo a past secret affair coming to light with a brigade of questions looming to the real truth of Emma’s past; something our killer wants to make certain comes to light. (And oh yes, there will be spoilers)

Cast: At least the ones we shall briefly discuss. Also notice the characters they pretty much emulate, whether intended or not.

Willa Fitzgeald (Emma Duvall/”Sidney”): Our survivor girl whose otherwise been left out of the loop on most things pertaining to her life. Her social life a lie as we discover her entry into the popular crowd was due to some “She’s All That” bet. Her home life overshadowed by her mother’s past, which is overflowing with secrets. Not to mention daddy issues streamed from his not so recent disappearance; inevitably causing her to fall right into the arms of some beautiful stranger whose age wasn’t the only debatable thing about him. Sidney Prescott, she is not. Nor will ever certainly be.

Bex Taylor-Klaus (Audrey Jensen/”Mickey”): “The freaky Tarantino film student!” Who the show appears to be about in our first episode as it’s a viral video or her kissing a girl, seemingly aiming to ruin the rest of her High School career. Except, are two girls just kissing really that big of a deal/surprise in 2015. Seriously? The fact that her character is made to be secluded out and stared at the moment entering her campus for such seems wildly antiquated or an attempt to give her some motive. It couldn’t so simply be the angry lesbian shtick. That’d be too…expected.

John Karna (Noah Foster/”Randy”): Except he’s some second-rate version of the beloved Randy from the films and I’m not so accepting. He comes across as the typical expectation when thinking “geek” in any particular fashion for the times. Liking appropriately themed pop culture and being ultra savvy in the tech department. Plagued with the most cliché music anytime he’s kind enough to let the audience in on ‘the just’ of the situation with informative monologues that grew tiresome each time another would start to kick in. Which, is often.

Tom Maden (Jake Fitzgerald/”Stu”): What bothers me most with this show is its overabundance of chodes. Which I refer to those ‘perfect’ guys whose appearance never seems off in the slightest; despite their often douche personality. Made up of perfectly quaffed hair and mannerisms that you know are too good to be true. Using the term “bro” the way a valley girl uses ‘like.’ This generation has had a Gremlins affect with this type, this particular character probably the most annoying of the batch. His poor delivery, over acting and overall annoying presence on-screen made me keep wishing the killer would make him a next target. In fact, he even has one of those bullshit scenes thrown in where he should have undoubtedly died, yet found himself the lucky recipient of “just barely missing major arteries.” What a crock, though again, another possible ruse.

Carlson Young (Brooke Maddox): Notice how she’s not set to emulate any one particular person. It’s because she’s the ‘slut’ of the group, maintaining an on and off again relationship with their teacher Mr. Branson (Seth Campo). So pardon me for not siding with her sad little rich girl routine or bitch with a heart of gold demeanor that she so desperately tries to pull off. She can usually be found pursing ones lips or shamelessly flirting (quite obviously) with her “secret” boyfriend. Biggest concern when it came to those around her dying off one at a time? Finding the right colored nail polish for the funerals along with actual waterproof mascara. Yeahhhhh, she can just go ahead and die too now; she will not be missed.

  • As though I’ve made it so difficult to tell by now, I was not a fan. Though I did sincerely go in with the intent of wanting to give it a shot. Hearing others (mainly through Facebook) who claimed in their surprise of the series. How it wasn’t actually “that bad.” And to a certain stand point, I guess their right. It’s much, much worse. Trying to put aside this generations lingo, the acting is just, horrid. Mostly all around though there’s few exceptions.
    Having failed to mention ‘Jack’s’ better half in the show Will (Connor Weil), he’s equally as chode-tastic. Both boys blackmailing the Mayor (Bryan Batt) after a tape of him hiding what appeared to be a body was found. Which makes the plot go up! Then down, repeating so as to have some sort of sub-plot deterring any attention from the real killer/s.
  • As well, they cast some of the most ridiculously beautiful looking people for absolutely no reason. It’s hilarious. The teacher Mr. Branson (Bobby Campo) and the Sheriff’s son Kieran (Amades Serafini) specifically. I’m almost certain every time they were on TV they moved in slow motion, sure to capture the perfect “Who, me?” look often associated with killers. I believe I quite literally L-O-L’d as soon as they enter the frame.
  • With a catchphrase like “You’ll never see it coming,” you would think that they’d really have one hell of an ending for us. But speaking as of episode nine, who can honestly say they didn’t see Kieran being one of the killers by this point. Unless his good looks and charm really did throw you off- in which case, I hope you don’t often talk to strangers. I still think there has to be one other killer if not even a third involvement somehow. But that could be me just wishful thinking.  There surly are a lot of ideas as to who else could be involved with the murders, most fingers pointing to Piper (Amelia Rose Blaire), a reporter akin to Gale Weathers, possible looking for her next big story. Or Mr. Branson, a couple different motives able to be said for his character. In all honestly, I’m not even sure I even care at this point who the killer is or why they’re doing it. I just want to see them all die! Which you can hopefully pardon my bluntness about but I have no emotional connection to any of these characters. I find them all annoying and watch them do things they know they shouldn’t do, especially with a killer on the loose. So why should I applaud such insipid ways? As much as I see arguments made in Noah’s favor he’s a little too Big Bang Theory for myself and I can’t get past those monologues. Watching the show just makes me want to throw on the films so I can see the real thing. My thoughts on the second season? Here we go again, again! 
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